How to stay friends with an ex?

Just been through a breakup? Are you considering being friends with him? If you've answered, Yes? for both, this one is for you. You've probably spent years, months together creating happy memories with someone. You've loved, laughed and lived. Unfortunately, you had to call it quits. The thought of them not being in your life anymore is terrifying. Some of your girlfriends might say that its perfectly okay to still be friends with him, while the others might think it's the worst idea ever. Ultimately, there's no right or wrong answer to this age-old question. It'll be different for each couple, depending on how things ended. But as you begin to consider a new friendship, there are several factors you need to consider.

1. An Ex-Detox

First up, there should always be a period where there's limited or absolutely no contact and exposure. A breakup is like a loss in the family. You have to process this separation emotionally. For starters, unfollow them on social media asap. Stalking your ex on Facebook will only end up making you anxious and jealous. At this stage, you shouldn't be seeing each other in person, even if there are a lot of mutual friends you have in common. Take some time apart to heal properly, process your feelings.

2. Get Closure

It is very crucial to get closure before you can be friends again. If questions still remain as to why the breakup happened, what did you do wrong, was it something you said, why did he decide to call it off- then if you do become friends you'll always be insecure and uncomfortable with each other.

3. Talk About What Went Wrong

This is important. Talk about what you did to each other, you may have said or done things you didn't mean. Admit the mistakes and accept the apologies. You both have moved on but it's important to not let anymore resentment brew further.

4. Appreciate The Fact That You Know Each Other

Relationships aren't easy, and being friends with your ex might seem like a reminder of the investment that you both made in vain. But remember, the two of you know each other really well and a friendship based on that can be awesome!

5. Have No Expectations

Now this one is very tricky. The subconscious is a cheeky little beast and you have to make yourself aware of what's driving the interest in remaining friends. If you think you and your ex will hook up or even get back together again, then don't even think about being friends. It's a bad idea. A really bad idea. Think about why you broke up anyways.

6. Explain To Your Current Partner That Your Ex is Just A Friend

If you happen to be in a fairly new relationship you might want to explain the relationship that you and your ex share. Being best friends with your ex at the risk of a jealous BF isn't really worth it. After all, honesty is the best policy. Explain to him why you want to be friends with your ex and make sure he believes you. Trust is all you need! The first and most important thing you have to do is be honest with yourself and what your intentions are. You also have to be able to hang out with your ex comfortably. No jealousy. No anxiety. It should feel natural. If your ex was a toxic influence who made you weak, cut the cord and let him go. But if he made you a better person, then being just friends would work out just fine for you.